Off Asides On Dallas Cowboys
Bless Wade Phillips’ pea-pickin’ little ol’ heart.
The Cowboys coach tried to be marketable and media savvy. He tried to create a rallying cry (ala former coach Jimmy Johnson’s now famous “How ‘Bout Them Cowboys!”)
But the big lug just ain’t got it in him.
Phillips burst into the locker room after yesterday’s convincing 24-0 thrashing of the Philadelphia Eagles, and with TV cameras rolling he yelled, “This thing’s just got started!”
Then his excitement and exuberance evaporated and he became mumbly and quiet as usual and started droning on about the next week’s practice schedule and other minutia. Cameras quickly cut back to the broadcast team.
Wade, this is how to brand a rallying cry and keep the cameras on you:
Anybody got any ideas for a new and improved 2010 version of “How ‘Bout Them Cowboys!”?
My admittedly lame suggestion: “Cowboys B Bad!”
Which reminds me that tight end and self-promoting “rapper” Martellus “MartyB” Bennett continues his disappearing act. Tony Romo threw one pass to MartyB yesterday but he dropped it. MartyB thinks way too much about his cereal and not enough about football.
Meanwhile, rookie tight end John Phillips is catching most everything thrown his way these days.
Ever wonder what tight ends from the Cowboys’s past might have called themselves if they had been all hip hoppy like MartyB?
Here are four possibilities (full names of players are at bottom of the post)
J Nova Kane
Arlington residents get persnickety when TV announcers refer to the Dallas Cowboys stadium as being in Dallas or North Texas or the Metroplex. Arlington residents taxed themselves to the tune of $325 million to lure Jones to their fair city and they want name credit.
So, wasn’t it nice when yesterday’s game began with announcer Joe Buck saying hello from “this monstrosity in Arlington Texas.”
Then again, that’s better than Philly columnist Phil Sheridan calling the stadium “a hilarious shrine to bad taste.”
But what do you expect from a Philly writer who watched his team get shut up and shut out by a hated rival? He was so shaken up he also wrote: “It is very hard to imagine the Eagles coming back into this building on Saturday night and winning.”
Philly was beaten up physically and mentally by a jazzed up Cowboys team yesterday, and I predict more of the same this Saturday night.
Hard-drinking golfer John Daly was in the owner’s suite during yesterday’s game. One can only assume that Jones offers an open bar in his suite. Wonder where Daly ended up last night?
Offensive Game Ball goes to wide receiver Miles Austin for continuing to play lights out while the rest of the receiver crew plugs along.
Defensive Game Ball goes to linebacker Anthony Spencer for his two sacks and constant backfield pressure. On second thought, two straight shutouts means every player on the defense played lights out. Pigskins for everyone!
Bench the Bum Award: Take a load off, Roy Williams, who was completely out of sync with Romo yet again. (Say hello to my little friend, Kevin Ogletree.)
J Nova Kane (Jay Novacek)
MC Dupree (Billy Joe DuPree)
Notorious N.U.T. (Mike Ditka)
Puff Dropsy (Jackie Smith)