Kill “The Simpsons”
Slip Bart and Lisa a cyanide pill. Push Marge down a flight of stairs. Stand Homer in front of a firing squad. Do whatever you have to, but for the love of God, please put The Simpsons out of its misery. (The show is about to reach a record-setting 500th episode this weekend).
I say this as someone who, through the ‘90s and early ‘00s, was a huge fan of Matt Groening and James L. Brooks’ once brilliant show. It helped shape a generation’s worldview, and even their speech patterns. (If you want to know why some of us still say “dude,” it’s Bart’s fault).
While The Simpsons in 2012 isn’t the worst show on broadcast TV, it has settled into a robotic mediocrity that is depressing for those who savor its glory days. I watched several episodes last year, none of which were memorable. Groening and Brooks aren’t doing the show’s legacy any favors by letting it linger looong past the point when anything could remain fresh and inventive. So drop an a-bomb on Springfield and let’s commence with the grieving.