Rick Perry Helps Us Get Healthy

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Posted July 10, 2012 by Kristian Lin in Blotch
Here's Rick Perry's health care plan for Texas!Here's Rick Perry's health care plan for Texas!

Well, our genius governor is at it again. Rick Perry announced yesterday that he’s refusing to implement the Affordable Care Act in Texas, joining a list of Republican governors who are trying to act all tough since the Supreme Court upheld the law two weeks ago and ruined their Fourth of July holidays. Apparently, the federal government’s plan to give Texas $20 billion as part of Obamacare is a despicable act of tyranny, and the Lone Star State won’t stand for it! No sir, our health care system is just great the way it is! We may have 25 percent of Texans without health insurance, but no matter. Rick Perry says we have the finest health care in the world. That sound you just heard is everyone in Switzerland laughing into their fondue. Just ignore them. Fondue sucks anyway. You tell ‘em, Governor! States’ rights! Don’t mess with Texas! Some other stuff!

Seriously, this would be great if Rick Perry had his own plan for solving the impending health care crunch that our state is facing. Does he actually have such a plan? Of course not, he’s Rick Perry! So Texas’ health care industry will take a big hit. And when the federal government comes in and sets up a state health care exchange, it’ll actually increase Washington’s power in Texas. And if you’re one of the 1.8 million uninsured Texans who could have been covered by Medicaid, you can just treat your bronchitis or diabetes or non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma by eating chicken soup until you feel better. At least our governor gets to stomp his feet and act like a big man. That’s what’s important.


10 Comments


  1.  
    Veronica

    Someone had to say it. Perry is a joke. Starting to feel ashamed to live in Texas….




  2.  
    Adrian

    How much money does the US government have? If you keep taking money out of the piggy bank…you’ll eventually have nothing. If I can’t afford healthcare, then I don’t deserve it. Funny thing is, I can’t afford healthcare, but you don’t see me with my hand held out begging for healthcare. Sorry that Rick Perry is saving money for the future. Obviously those of us who can’t afford healthcare, don’t know how to save. Period. Hey, death is just a part of life. Get sick, can’t afford care, you get what you get.

    Me like chicken flavored broth




    •  
      Ickster

      This response is pathetic. Someday you will need healthcare and we will pay for it.
      Saving money for the future? ha ha!
      Rick Perry IS a joke.




      •  
        Winston

        @Adrian:

        How much money does the US Government have? I don’t know, how much money exists in the world? Still not enough? Then, let’s just print some more. What? Inflation? Built-in debt? What the fuck are those things? I just pay my taxes just like all the other normal people, I’m no freeloader! What’s that? Corporations are people? Poppycock! People are not allowed to help other people! Not for free anyways, we gotta keep the population in check! The less people there are, the more dollars get passed around to whoever is left! Whaddya mean it dont’ work that way? Gotta save room for other peoples too. I mean, Fair is Fair, yeah? We can’t discriminate against the Negroes , or the Chinamen, or the Mexicans or the TacoHuts or the Texas Fried Pizzas or the… What Mestizo? What the fuck is that, son? Is that like one of them new fangled KenTacoHuts that I have been hearing about? Oooh boy, I can’t wait to get my hands on one of them Stuffed Crust Double Down Gorditas…

        Rabble Rabble Rabble “God and Christianity” Rabble Rabble Rabble This is America! Speak English! Rabble Rabble Rabble Commie Pinko Scum! Rabble Rabble Rabble American Nationalist Socialist Party? Sounds good, as long as they get their flags from China! Bolsheviks? They sound poor, fuck them too! Goddamn Witches done put the Evil Eye on me again… Rabble Rabble Rabble Australopithecus! PFFT! Fuck him too, sounds like an Ivy League CarpetBagger Liberal! What? Godless Science! Who needs facts or data or empirical evidence. Subjective perspective is always the way to go. Fuck the other foot and his shoe too! Fuck it all. I’m so scared of this 2012 Doomsday stuff, but I’m a good Christian, so I’m gonna judge the fuck outta those minorities before I go. And by minorities, I mean poor people. Faith? I have faith in the Almighty God Fearin’ Greenback! You see? Says it right there, “IN GOD WE TRUST”. Now which god do you think they’re talking about? Does it say Allah or Buddah? No sir. It says “GOD”. You see, Money IS Faith, so the more money you have, the more faith you have. And thus, the more favor God will show you.You see “poor” is relative, I mean, I am poor, by my own admittance. But one man’s trash , is another man’s treasure. So fuck him and his poor trash, who died and made him the Queen of Sheba! HAR HAR HAR! I don’t even what/where Sheeba is. I’m just scared. Did I mention I was scared? You fear what you hate! And by golly, I sure as hell hate what I don’t understand! 99%? What the fuck is that? Speak English son! What 9/10ths of a pie? Now who the hell would eat 9 out of 10 pie pieces for themselves? Everyone knows there are only 8 slices of pie in ANY given fucking pie EVER created on the face of this Holy Planet! It says it right fucking there in the Book of Genesis, “Thou shalt not lay with another man.” What? Of course I eat rabbit, and lobster. Rabbit-stuffed-Lobster is my favorite! Best goddamn invention since sliced bread I say! And Turduckens too , of course. What? Book of Leviticus? Locusts? Grasshoppers? Boy, meow you listen here good meow, This… Is… America… Around here… we SPEAK American… Get it? Name of the country speaks the name of the tounge. Mexicans speak Mexican, Africans speak African. What? Africa’s a continent?!? Bullshit! Texas used to be a continent too, you see. Even had our own tounge, too. Texan, like the pecan, you see. What? No, no no. You don’t EAT pecans! You eat MEAT! This is Cattlemen Country.No need to fact check any of this son. You see, I saw it on Judge Judy, so that makes it legal. Look it’s simple you see, money is Time, you see? Like in that movie with Justin Timberland, you know the one with them fancy boots. I hear he throws a mean pigskin! He had himself one of those fancy future Rolex watches implanted in his arm, and but it was pre-paid, you see, so when you run out of minutes , like a cell phone, you can’t make no more calls no more, except’n this case, you just drop dead in broad daylight in the middle of your shift at the KenTacoHut. Look it came out on the Blue-Ray! What? You don’t BELIEVE in the 3D! Now you listen here meow, I am a God-fearin’ Christian. And if I EVER, here you take the lord’s name in vain again… RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE…

        This went on for quite some time… DelGue , with an “E”, would later go on to be known as the first “IN REAL LIFE troll” in history. Or as Charlie Murphy would say, “he was mad niggerish” …

        And poor Winston turned out to be a Replicant stuck in a Turing Test loop sequence. He tried and tried to speak the Truth to DelGue with an “E”, but it was pearls before swine as they say.

        The irony of it all is, that, from afar, one could not tell the difference from the robot and the human.




  3.  
    Adrian

    So what you’re saying is: Although I’m an irresponsible adult, when I get sick, I should receive free healthcare? When I get hungry I should be fed? When I’m naked I should be clothed? When I’m out on the streets, I should be given a home?

    Isn’t it only fair that if I do nothing but receive free public assistance, everyone else should too? What if everyone in America took of government assistance tomorrow? Imagine how quickly the government debt would rise to an irreparable number.

    Imagine if free healthcare stopped tomorrow? Well, I think that would cause folks to be a bit more responsible knowing that if their body gets sick, they better have the pennies in the bank to take care of their ass. Additionally, you would likely see healthcare prices drop drastically to more affordable numbers. Simple supply and demand.

    I’ll wait for you all to tell me how wrong I am.




    •  
      anonorob

      You’re wrong the day that your mom can’t afford health care and dies because of it. In your own words, “Hey, death is just a part of life. Get sick, can’t afford care, you get what you get.”




  4.  
    Obama's Seat

    If you want a little background on what Perry’s doing, read this from Cato:

    http://www.cato.org/publications/commentary/obamacares-now-bigger-mess

    This is what’s going to kill ObamaCare. Bottom line, if states can pass off the expense, they will, because they can.

    Of course, this can all be avoided by the feds if they come up with a way to punish states, as they did to force the 55mph limit.




  5.  
    cautious

    What gets me is how people are so blinded by what they are told and go with it. There are many followers and not enough leaders.

    People come out and scream that the government is forcing you to do many things, etc, etc. THe government has done it since it’s beginning so why complain. Here in Texas we are made to buy insurance to renew our license, to drive, etc. Now why should I have to buy it if I don’t want to. Yes insurance helps to pay for accidents but I shouldn’t be forced to buy it. If I don’t have it I can also get arrested or fined. Responsible people would buy it. Same principle people who don’t have it or don’t care to buy it will only go to the emergency room to get help they need. We are in a society that wants the cake and to eat it too. Until they are forced to do something then they scream tyranny.

    Whether good or bad on the law, give credit for at least trying to do something. All the republicans who are so opposed have the best insurance so why worry. Rick Perry gets paid enough to get healthcare so why should he care about the rest. People wake up.. he is making decisions that affect the entire state and yet zombies follow him.
    Don’t be hypocrites




    •  
      Obama's Seat

      Ok, they have credit for doing something, now let’s repeal it and do it right. Nancy Pelosi can strut and preen through the crowd with her big gavel again.

      This time, we’ll do what makes sense and doesn’t bankrupt the country for the purpose of putting a feather in someone’s cap.




  6.  
    anonorob

    We can’t repeal and replace, repeal and replace, repeal and replace. Live with what’s been offered and work to make it better.





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