Jane Austen vs. Kelly Clarkson: Celebrity Grudge Match

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Posted August 13, 2013 by JIMMY FOWLER in Blotch
Kelly_Clarkson

Somebody needs to tell Burleson native Kelly Clarkson that she’s not acting like a pop star. First off, she apparently reads. Literature. For fun. It was her appreciation of British author Jane Austen that led her to purchase a turquoise-and-gold ring that once belonged to Austen. Cocaine and Courvoisier are not good enough for Ms. Clarkson –– early 19th century English prose is what puts her “in the zone” before a concert. Ooh la la!

Now, the British government has claimed that ring and plans to hold it until native Brits can raise the cash to buy it back from Clarkson. They’ve thrown around words like “national treasure” and “historical significance,” as if there is a responsibility bigger than being the top-earning American Idol alum (over 28 million digital tracks sold; bite it, Underwood!). Clarkson reportedly wants to cooperate and plans to sell back the Austen ring so it can remain in England. Hopefully, she’ll come to her rock star senses and urinate in a mop bucket — or do something  – as a protest. Otherwise, a dangerous precedent could be set: Pop stars might have to start acknowledging a world outside their own.


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