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Posts Tagged ‘New York Giants’
FORMER PRESIDENT GEORGE W. BUSH PAINTS PUDDY TATS NOW.

Off Asides on Dallas Cowboys vs NY Giants, Kitties

Jeff Prince
The Dallas Cowboys are about to make their 2016 debut at home against NFC East rival New York Giants, and once again Fort Worth Weekly brings you the much-lauded Off Asides.  (NOTE: Two lauds were received last year from Cathy...


ROBERT DE NIRO TRAUMATIZED HAZEL THE RESEARCH ASSISTANT AND MATT CASSEL TO SECURE A WIN FOR THE NEW YORK GIANTS.

Off Asides: Dallas Cowboys vs New York Giants, Robert De Niro

Jeff Prince
Brandon “The Tangerine Trainwreck” Weeden is history. Ancient history. The Weeden Era is reminiscent of the Mesozoic Era — a big dinosaur lumbered around and did little but eat turf. The Weeden Era would actua...



BRAIN FREEZE WAS CONTAGIOUS IN THE NFC EAST THIS WEEK.

Morning News Roundup, Sep 15

Jeff Prince
Police Seek Help In Finding Suspects A guy gets out of a black Mitsubishi Outlander Sport and cold-cocks another guy in a Wal-Mart parking lot, and then takes off. Marty Britton, 55, refused treatment at first, but later went t...


HAZEL: "i JUST DREAMED A RABBIT WITH A PATCH OF FUR SHAPED LIKE A STAR WAS ALMOST TRAPPED AND KILLED BY A GIANT HUNTER."

Off Asides On Dallas Cowboys vs NY Giants

Jeff Prince
Yay, the moment we’ve all been waiting for! (The excitement is so intense I don’t even care that I ended the first sentence of the first Off Asides of the new football season with a dangling preposition. It’s crazy!) Holy...



(Courtesy Wikipedia)

News Roundup: May 29, 2015

Jeff Prince
Let’s Saddle Up And Pedal Apparently legs can be used for something other than climbing into pickups and pushing accelerators. Fort Worth Bike Sharing recently expanded to 43 stations and 350 bikes, including a station in the...


CHRIS GAINES AKA GARTH BROOKS AKA SPASTIC CLOWN

Off Asides On Dallas Cowboys vs NY Giants, Greatest Catch

Jeff Prince
It’s Sunday night and I’m prepped for the Cowboys game — the drop of queso staining my t-shirt should be the glorious first of many. It’s great to be an American. First thing I notice is the stubble-faced an...



thanksg

Off Asides On Dallas Cowboys vs New York Giants

Jeff Prince
With Thanksgiving approaching, I’ll begin Off Asides this week by expressing gratitude and sincere homage to something very dear to my heart — the high-def, big-screen TV. Your colorful palette and non-glare visage ...


vulture

Buzzards Circle Dallas Cowboys

Jeff Prince
Man, what a tough crowd. The Dallas Cowboys played an exciting, action-packed game against the Super Bowl champion New York Giants, almost pulled off a miraculous victory, and provided TV viewers with four hours of entertainmen...



david goliath

Off Asides On Dallas Cowboys vs NY Giants

Jeff Prince
This David and Goliath story ended badly. First off, David forgot his slingshot. Secondly, his movements were encumbered by a huge goiter on his neck. He did bring a six-shooter — but shot all six rounds into his own foot...


MARTELLUS BENNETT. (photo by Shankbone)

New York Loves Former Cowboy Marty B

Jeff Prince
Blotch had mixed feelings after Martellus Bennett ditched the Dallas Cowboys and headed for the more polluted pastures of New York City. The Giants signed the free agent to a $2.5 million one-year contract after the Cowboys mad...