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Posts Tagged ‘Off Asides’
SATURDAY NIGHT'S GIFT FROM A FRIEND TURNED INTO SUNDAY'S INABILITY TO STAY AWAKE FOR THE COWBOYS GAME.

Off Asides: Dallas Cowboys vs New Orleans Saints, Tequila

Jeff Prince
This edition of Off Asides will be short because Saturday’s bottle of tequila was tall. My buddy, Blue, dropped by after a visit to Mexico bearing a gift that we proceeded to consume over the course of the evening. Now it’s...


BRANDON "WTF" WEEDEN HAD A ROUGH DAY, BUT BY THE END OF THE GAME HE'D LEARNED A VALUABLE LESSON ABOUT LIFE.

Off Asides on Dallas Cowboys vs Falcons, Nicknames

Jeff Prince
Sunday morning, two hours before the Dallas Cowboys play, and I’m all jazzed up about seeing Brandon “The Ginger Cringer” Weeden take the reins. The team’s two biggest guns, Tony Romo and Dez Bryant, are...



THE LATE, GREAT ESTHER WILLIAMS.

Off Asides On Dallas Cowboys vs Iggles, Injuries

Jeff Prince
The broken bone in Dez Bryant’s foot could keep him sidelined for up to three months. Who knows when the Cowboys No. 1 wide receiver will be back to normal? Maybe not until next year.  How does this affect the Dallas Cowboys...


HAZEL: "i JUST DREAMED A RABBIT WITH A PATCH OF FUR SHAPED LIKE A STAR WAS ALMOST TRAPPED AND KILLED BY A GIANT HUNTER."

Off Asides On Dallas Cowboys vs NY Giants

Jeff Prince
Yay, the moment we’ve all been waiting for! (The excitement is so intense I don’t even care that I ended the first sentence of the first Off Asides of the new football season with a dangling preposition. It’s crazy!) Holy...



HANS AND FRANZ WON'T STOP PUMPING US UP

Off Asides on Dallas Cowboys vs Green Bay Packers, Fate

Jeff Prince
Off Asides wakes up Sunday morning feeling like Kris Kristofferson — with no way to hold my head that doesn’t hurt, looking for my cleanest dirty shirt, and thinking of Rita Coolidge riding bareback on a palomino wh...


DONNA DOUGLAS IN 1967 (courtesy wikipedia)

Off Asides on Dallas Cowboys vs Detroit Lions, Chokers

Jeff Prince
Today’s Off Asides is devoted to Donna Douglas, an early TV crush for young men who grew up watching The Beverly Hillbillies. The sweet but fiery Elly May Clampett is now swimming in that big cement pond in the sky. (Is it wr...



YOU'RE GETTING SLEEPY, VERY SLEEPY. (courtesy wikimedia)

Off Asides On Dallas Cowboys vs Philadelphia Eagles, Dreams

Jeff Prince
Attending an after-hours party on Saturday night/Sunday morning means Off Asides is not in tip-top shape on Sunday night to deliver the world’s most insightful column on the Dallas Cowboys. This stark reality dawns on me when...


THIS BEANIE-WEARING DOG ONLY WISHES HE LOOKED AS COOL AS HAZEL (courtesy Jason Sussberg on flickr)

Off Asides On Dallas Cowboys vs Chicago Bears, Statistics

Jeff Prince
If the calendar is to be believed, it’s December. And if curses are to be believed, the Dallas Cowboys will soon crumble. The curse appears to have rubbed off on me, as I’m pulled over for speeding on my way home from work ...



CHRIS GAINES AKA GARTH BROOKS AKA SPASTIC CLOWN

Off Asides On Dallas Cowboys vs NY Giants, Greatest Catch

Jeff Prince
It’s Sunday night and I’m prepped for the Cowboys game — the drop of queso staining my t-shirt should be the glorious first of many. It’s great to be an American. First thing I notice is the stubble-faced an...


teeth

Off Asides On Dallas Cowboys vs Jaguars In London

Jeff Prince
The Dallas Cowboys would remain in second place even if they lost yesterday’s game at Wembley Stadium, and yet the game had a must-win, do-or-die feel to it. Last week’s fiasco made it clear that backup quarterback ...