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Anybody who has ever considered buying one of those fancy Tempur-Pedic mattresses might appreciate my recent experience. Until Sunday, I’d never bought a mattress in my life. I’ve slept on hand-me-down mattresses since moving from my parents’ home many years ago. For the past four years, I’ve been sleeping on the most uncomfortable mattress ever made — thin, old, squeaky, and void of anything resembling softness, kind of like sleeping on Joan Rivers but without the bad jokes.

That mattress was going to be the death of me. My fat ass was the only cushion separating my bones from the mattress’s coiled-steel springs, and I awoke each morning feeling as if the ghost of John Bonham had played the “Whole Lotta Love” drum solo on my hips all night – with metal drumsticks wrapped in barbwire.

For years I’ve been seeing those Tempur-Pedic Mattress commercials that make jaw-dropping claims: You can set a glass of wine on the bed and let kids jump up and down on the mattress but the glass doesn’t move; you can lie on your side, back, front, whatever, and the mattress will conform to your body and cradle you like a big, foamy angel, relieving the painful pressure points that cause tossing and turning.

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It all sounded too good to be true, kind of like those Ronco commercials for a $10 pair of scissors that can cut through a manhole cover. But I talked to Greg Reed of Woodbine Custom Furniture & Accessories the other day, and he explained how he and his wife have been sleeping on Tempur-Pedic mattresses for years and swear by them. So I rolled the dice and bought me a $2,000, Queen-sized foamy piece of paradise, and after three nights of sleeping on it, I’m pretty well convinced it’s the best money I’ve ever spent. I’ve been sleeping like a baby. Actually, babies stay up half the night crying and wailing at the top of their lungs, so I guess I should say I used to sleep like a baby. Now I sleep really good.

10 COMMENTS

  1. Next time skip the Tempurpricey model and head to Sams Club. They sell a “TempSoma” knockoff which supposedly has the same “denier rating” as the expensive stuff (don’t ask me what denier is.. thought it may have been a Middle-Eastern monetary unit). I bought mine there years ago and have slept back-pain free since for about $500 instead of $2000.

  2. To John: Thanks for the advice. By the way, I did research these types of mattresses, including the knock-offs, and decided the safest bet was to go with the name brand, purchased through a local reputable dealer who would provide any guarantees or refunds in the event the mattress didn’t work for me. I’ve known Greg Reed over at Woodbine for a long time and know he’s so honest you can play dice with him over the phone. I felt like going that route was best for me. But it sounds like your method worked well for you too. And by the way, after five nights I’m still convinced it was money well spent.

  3. Hey Jeff, glad to hear you’re enjoying a great night’s sleep. And, I may take you up on the dice-over-the-phone game. As for the TempurPedic, I don’t know of a better product on the market. If anyone’s interested, come visit one of our showrooms and give one a try. You can find out where, store hours, etc at http://www.woodbinefurniture.com.

    For the techincal folks, who like to read, the following is from TempurPedic.com:

    Our Swedish TEMPUR® material
    TEMPUR pressure-relieving material is a breakthrough in sleep technology that has forever changed the way millions sleep. The story of this revolutionary material, the heart and soul of all Tempur-Pedic products, begins with NASA’s research to develop a material to relieve the tremendous g-forces experienced by astronauts. Our Swedish scientists, realizing the enormous potential of the material, spent nearly a decade and millions of research dollars perfecting TEMPUR material as the ultimate sleep surface.

    Patented Construction
    Our patented integration of multiple layers of TEMPUR material with different base materials provides a variable balance of pressure-relieving comfort and therapeutic support. The top TEMPUR Comfort Layer (A) is a softer formula that reacts immediately to your body temperature and weight. As you sink further into the mattress, the TEMPUR Support Layer (B) completely absorbs and distributes your body weight and supports your spine in perfect alignment. The typical AirFlow System™ Base Layer© provides a supportive base for the TEMPUR components and increases the flow of air to maximize comfort and responsiveness.

    Tempur-Pedic Outperforms All Others
    We started with 4 samples of exactly the same dimensions � 2 Competitive Product (CP) memory foam samples (taken from actual mattresses) and 2 TEMPUR® material (T) samples. 1 of each type was used as a control sample (B = Before) and the other as the test sample (A = After). Each of the test samples were compressed to 10% of their original thickness then subjected to accelerated aging in a hot, humid environment to simulate typical use for an extended period. The results are staggering. As you can see the TEMPUR material test sample (T-A) regained virtually all of its original thickness compared to the TEMPUR material control sample (T-B). The Competitive Product test sample (CP-A) regained only a small percentage of its original thickness and appears nearly flat when compared to the control samples and the tested TEMPUR sample. No matter which commodity memory foam we use to perform this test, the results are always the same � TEMPUR material clearly and consistently outperforms all others.

    Temperature & Weight Sensitive
    TEMPUR® material is engineered to respond differently to very slight changes in temperature to become soft where you want it and firm where you need it™. The material conforms exactly to every curve and angle of your body while supporting you in perfect alignment.

    As you can see in the images, TEMPUR conforms perfectly to your body, allowing your shoulders and hips to sink into the mattress just enough so that support is provided along your entire body. Memory foam mattresses either allow you to sink in too much creating a “hammock” effect under your body weight or they don’t allow you to sink in enough, pushing back and creating counter pressure and tossing and turning like a conventional mattress.

    Conventional mattresses exert counter-pressure that contorts your body into unnatural positions, restricting blood flow and causing pressure points. This result is tossing and turning, pain, and a lack of quality sleep.

    Energy Absorbing
    TEMPUR® material absorbs energy and relieves pressure to ensure that partners do not feel each other’s movements and sleep more soundly. Each partner is supported independently anywhere on the entire surface of the mattress (edge to edge) and will not roll together like they may on conventional mattresses or commodity memory foams.

    We placed a glass of wine on one side of our mattress while jumping up and down on the other in our now famous TV advertisements to depict TEMPUR material’s uncanny ability to absorb energy.

    Maintenance Free
    The high density and superior manufacturing process of TEMPUR® material ensures it will return to its original shape time after time. Our one-sided mattresses never need to be flipped, rotated or turned and are backed by a 20-year limited warranty. Body impressions are ancient history!

    TEMPUR material has a higher density than most commodity memory foams. However, density doesn’t tell the whole story…our advanced technology & our unique,proprietary formula & provides unsurpassed support, enhanced sensitivity and industry leading durability. TEMPUR provides these benefits across the entire surface area…from edge to edge for years and years of comfort without the need for added “edge support systems” created to compensate for inferior, commodity memory foams and their lack of true support.

    Pressure Relieving
    Pressure points can pinch off circulation causing discomfort and a seemingly endless night of tossing and turning. TEMPUR® material absorbs and redistributes your body weight (pressure) across the entire surface area to relieve these painful pressure points. Computer pressure mapping shows how a Tempur-Pedic mattress virtually eliminates these painful pressure points. Sleep clinic studies also indicate that the Tempur-Pedic mattress drastically reduces tossing and turning.1

    Commodity memory foams offer what they call “quicker recovery” or a “springier” feel. Faster recovery equals inferior pressure relief which leads to more tossing and turning and less support.

    Unique
    The formula and manufacturing process for TEMPUR® material is a proprietary trade secret known only to a handful of individuals at Tempur-Pedic. Authentic TEMPUR material is made in our company owned production facilities ONLY, two in the USA, using our proprietary formula and manufacturing process for use exclusively in Tempur-Pedic products…NO ONE ELSE HAS IT!

    TEMPUR material features a unique cellular structure. Billions of independently moveable micro-cells exchange air (breathe) through open windows as they reshape and conform to absorb the pressure exerted by your body weight. TEMPUR cells are consistently the same size and shape throughout resulting in unsurpassed consistency of feel and long lasting quality. This unique structure is the result of the decades of research and millions of dollars we’ve spent perfecting our material plus the investment we’ve made in our own manufacturing facilities. Commodity memory foams are secured from mass production foam plants around the world with varying levels of quality. These plants make all types of foams for all types of products from carpet padding to furniture.

    Recognizable
    Tempur-Pedic® has the only mattresses and pillows recognized by NASA and certified by the Space Foundation as well as more than 75,000 Professional Medical Customers worldwide.

    Our mattresses have earned the Good Housekeeping Seal, were awarded a Consumers Digest “best buy” and the prestigious Ease-of-Use Commendation from the Arthritis Foundation. These prestigious recognitions are confirmation that Tempur-Pedic products are of the highest quality. In fact, don’t just take our word for it…click to read what some of our owners are saying.

    1. Sleep Wellness Center at St. Joseph Healthcare, June 2, 2004

  4. Your article made me laugh, get chill bumps, and made me think I was there. You know why ? That bed you bought came standard with me under it. wah lah.

    know… can you raise it so I can buy one to stack it on ?

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