It’s been a long time, but Hip Tips is back, with more brain-melting indie-rock and sundry other faux-intellectual, artful goodies for your listening/reading/observing/getting-hip-finally pleasure.

New(-ish) Songs to Check Out:
“The Mountain” by Heartless Bastards: a lazy, sloppy, gargantuan slog through ‘60s-era garage/ice-house rock. Yawning pedal steel, swishy and pounding drums, grungy guitars, and frontwoman Erika Wennerstrom’s masculine voice = goodness. “Take it on down the li-on.” From the Queen City. Now of Austin.


“Inland Sea” by And You Will Know Us by the Trail of Dead: pianistic and Beatles-esque but totally epic indie-rock from another Austin export. Feh.

“Keep Your Eyes Ahead” by Helio Sequence: thanks to Calhoun co-songwriter and all-around bon vivant Jordan Roberts for turning me onto HS, whose song here is ‘80s-poppish (in the best sense of the term), courtesy mainly of the echoing guitar, snappy beat, and frontman Brandon Summer’s cautionary, Brit-pop-influenced delivery.

New(-ish) Stuff to Read:
50 Years of Popular Songs Condensed into Single Sentences
By Marc Haynes (from McSweeney’s)

The Beatles, “I Want to Hold Your Hand”
I want to do it with you.

Marvin Gaye, “Let’s Get It On”
I want to do it with you.

Led Zeppelin, “Whole Lotta Love”
I want to do it with you.

James Blunt, “You’re Beautiful”
I want to do it with you.

Sir Mix-a-Lot, “Baby Got Back”
I want to do it.

Elvis Presley, “Hound Dog”
You’re doing it with everyone.

R. Kelly, “I Believe I Can Fly”
I believe I want to do it with you.

Patsy Cline, “Crazy”
I want to do it with you so much I’m going fucking nuts.

Frank Sinatra, “Strangers in the Night”
I’m drunk, and I want to do it with you.

The White Stripes, “My Doorbell”
Using metaphor, I want to do it with you.

Little Richard, “Good Golly Miss Molly”
I’m doing it with Miss Molly, and she’s totally into it.

Duran Duran, “Rio”
I’d love to do that chick dancing on the sand.

The Beatles, “Why Don’t We Do It in the Road?”
I’d like to do it with you right now.

Carly Simon, “You’re So Vain”
We used to do it, but then you did it with someone else, and now I’m not going to do it with you, although I wish we were still doing it.

Pulp, “Common People”
I once met a stuck-up European who wanted to do it with me.

Radiohead, “Creep”
I’m filled with self-loathing, and, though outwardly I hate everything you represent, I want to do it with you.

Kate Bush, “Wuthering Heights”
I’m an 18th-century fictional character, and I want to do it with another 18th-century fictional character.

Bob Dylan, “Blowin’ in the Wind”
The Man is currently doing it to you.

Elvis Presley, “Jailhouse Rock”
Incarcerated men will on occasion do it with each other.

Meat Loaf, “I Would Do Anything for Love (But I Won’t Do That)”
Hey! You won’t believe what this one chick said while I was doing it with her!

Kings of Leon, “Sex on Fire”
I did it with you, and now it hurts when I pee.

Céline Dion, “My Heart Will Go On”
Even your death has not stopped me wanting to do it with you.

AC/DC, “You Shook Me All Night Long”
We did it yesterday.