Who’d have thought? Turns out one person’s delicious spicy condiment is another’s toxic environmental hazard. Obviously, the citizens of Irwindale, CA don’t realize that Sriracha –– manufactured by Huy Fong Foods at a plant in their town –– is the most amazing bottled sauce on the planet (next to that Valentina Salsa Picante stuff). The Irwindale tenderfoots don’t like the “offensive chili odor” (a textbook oxymoron!) and want the plant out. A Denton city councilman, cleverly surmising that college students consume Sriracha by the gallon during late night, beer-and-THC-inspired binges, extended a warm Texas invitation for Huy Fong to come stink up Denton.
Personally, the prospect of living within sixty miles of a Sriracha factory thrills me. It would be sorta like if Charlie Bucket woke up to discover that The Chocolate Factory was now easily accessible via a couple of different interstate freeways. Ever tried Sriracha on cheese pizza? It’s divine. Ditto falafels. Ordering a half crispy duck from the nearby Chinese takeout and then drenching it with “The Kickin’ Chicken” (as some of us call the sauce with the rooster on the label) is my idea of a wild night. Don’t even get me started on dolloping Vietnamese meatballs with the stuff. You are my sunshine, Sriracha. Call me if the new Denton digs are set up.