You’ve heard of Ace Ventura, Pet Detective.

Meet Jeff Prince, Poop Detective.

Someone came to the Fort Worth Weekly office while it was closed and stuck an anonymous, handwritten letter on our front door with duct tape.


The letter was signed by “just an individual who does not think a person (anyone) should be allowed to get away with this.”

The letter accused a lakeside bar owner of releasing sewage into Eagle Mountain Lake.

The informant said he overheard the business owner’s wife say she wanted a swimming pool. Her husband told her she had a whole lake out their door. The wife replied, “I know what drains into that lake right off the dock.”

Not exactly an admission of guilt, but the informant sounded certain.

“No septic tank, just raw sewage drains into the lake. Check it out. Other property owners are aware of this,” the letter said.

I went to the business at Eagle Mountain Lake but didn’t see any obvious evidence.

So I performed a few finger stretching exercises and started dialing the phone.

A city official said the business isn’t inside the city limits, and suggested a call to Tarrant County officials.

The county said lakeside properties are regulated by Tarrant Regional Water District.

Water district employees inspected the situation and determined the business wasn’t releasing sewage after all. They tracked the leak to a faulty septic tank belonging to someone living in a trailer house near the bar, water district spokesman Chad Lorance said.

The leaky septic tank has since been repaired, he said.



  1. Nothing says “I care” like grey, sticky, fibrous duct tape. Come to think of it, in our usual Cowtown breezes (gale-force-or-so winds), duct tape made sense for message-affixing.

    In other Eagle Mountain news, are public reservoirs supposed to be accessible to the public?