No Refusal Weekend
This weekend is a “no refusal weekend” for drivers. If you get pulled over suspected of drinking and driving, the fuzz can take you to get your blood tested. So please, if you’re 21 or older, drink a lot of delicious booze, but have a designated driver ready to haul your soggy bones home. It might be better if you choose someone who will listen to you prattle on about Kathryn and how she’ll never do better than you –– you know how you get when you drink.
Our Lakes Are Back
It might have sucked to endure a solid month of rain, but at least the lakes are full now. U.S. Army Corps of Engineers are urging boaters to be careful. Bud Light Lime is urging you to hang a Roman candle out of your pants and fire it off into the night.
County Clerks Need Bigot Training
Repressed Hood County Clerk Katie Lang (I mean, c’mon, KD Lang?) will issue same-sex marriage licenses after all. Some clerks are frustrated that the state hasn’t provided any guidance on how to properly defy the law, others are just plugging their ears, covering their eyes, and rolling on the ground until they are raptured into heaven.
Bodies in the Trinity
A body was found in the Trinity River yesterday, but it was not the missing kayaker. That search has been called off by the Fire Department. Edgar Castro went missing three days ago.
Gag Order on Biker Brawl
A sweeping gag order was issued Tuesday in a lawsuit arising from a May brawl at a roadside restaurant in Waco, Texas, in which nine bikers were killed and 177 people arrested. The ruling in the lawsuit filed by Matthew Clendennen, a biker who says he was wrongfully arrested, prevents attorneys, witnesses and law enforcement officers involved in the case from discussing it with the media.