SHARE
THIS IS THE DALLAS COWBOYS' NEW MASCOT:

A Pittsburgh Steelers fan in this office (who will remain Anthonameless) can’t stand to hear the Dallas Cowboys called America’s Team.

Anthonameless grew up in Pittsburgh and watched the Steelers get lucky in a couple of games against the Cowboys back in the 1970s.

The Steelers might have won a game or two, but the Cowboys were crowned king.

FWW Women 300x250

NFL Films narrator John Facenda used his dulcet tones to perfection when he began a 1978 Cowboys highlight film with these fateful words, from which the greatest nickname in public relations history was born:

 

The Cowboys are the Notre Dame of professional football.

No matter where they play, their fans are there to greet them. 

Their faces are recognized by fans all across this country.

The sum total of their stars are a galaxy.

They are the Dallas Cowboys … America’s Team.

 

Now Anthonameless is trying to downplay this Yardbarker report that says the Cowboys are the most popular NFL team on the internet, with the most Facebook fans and web site visits.

The internet is the world wide web, so the Cowboys have now graduated from America’s Team to The World’s Team.

Anthonameless said, “But you’ve got to wonder how much internet chatter about the Cowboys is from Cowboys-haters like me.”

His significant other, who will also remain Dananymous, shot back: “You wouldn’t be a ‘fan’ on FB since you are a hater, and you wouldn’t be going to their website so … nice try!”

Nice try indeed.

The World’s Team. Sounds sweet to my ears.

3 COMMENTS

  1. I think the competition should be who is stupider, the Cowboys fans or the Stiller folks.

    Obviously, cousin Jeff wins this current one. It is FACENDA, nimrod, not ACENDA. Maybe you were thinking of a “ascending moronic behavior,” as all Cowboy fans have locked in a dominant part of their brain.

    As far as the Stillers go, many wonder why they only have an emblem on one side of their helmet. I think it has to do with the fact people in western PA (very similar to Arkansas) have some very simple math problems. When they started out, the team needed to get their helmets done, and the guy selling them their helmets asked how many helmets were needed. Let say he answered 50. Then the idiot helmet sales guy asked how many emblems they needed and the Stiller guy said 50. So they got 50 emblems and decided that was enough. Obviously, no one could multiply 50 times two (that would be 100, yunzes, or whatever your plural is out there in the holler).

    So this is a tough one. Cowboys have that great history of sexual exploits with Rafael Septien and Lance Renzel. But I’ll go with the Stillers on consistent and historical stupidity, as I always liked the story of defensive tackle Ernie Holmes using a rifle to randomly shoot at cars on a freeway from a bridge. The local law enforcement authorities thought this was normal behavior in that part of the world. Oh, the humanity.

LEAVE A REPLY