Forget 2012 doomsday prophecies, the apocalypse has obviously begun already — Nashville Songwriters Association International has just named Toby Keith the songwriter/artist of the decade.
Toby Effing Keith?
That guy’s sings flatter than a Lubbock parking lot, and he’s a huge blowhard with a tiny morsel of talent.
His lyrics are laughable, even when he’s being serious, which he was when he wrote this drivel:
Ohhh Justice will be served
And the battle will rage
This big dog will fight
When you rattle his cage
And you’ll be sorry that you messed with
The U.S. of A.
‘Cause we’ll put a boot in your ass
It’s the American way
And who can forget this early classic?:
We talk about your work how your boss is a jerk
We talk about your church and your head when it hurts
We talk about the troubles you’ve been having with your brother
About your daddy and your mother and your crazy ex-lover
We talk about your friends and the places that you’ve been
We talk about your skin and the dimples on your chin
The polish on your toes and the run in your hose
And God knows we’re gonna talk about your clothes
You know talking about you makes me smile
But every once in awhile
I wanna talk about me
Wanna talk about I
Wanna talk about number one Oh my me my
What I think, what I like, what I know, what I want, what I see
I like talking about you you you you, usually, but occasionally
I wanna talk about meeeeee