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I don’t know if Dallas has a brewery. I don’t spend any time there and don’t have any reason to follow Dallas-centric food/spirits journalism. But I do know that Fort Worth has a brewery, that everybody loves it, and that in a new Esquire story Rahr & Sons Brewing Co. has been selected to represent that NFL franchise that plays in Tarrant County (Arlington, specifically) and that formerly played in Irving but that claims “Dallas” as home.

 

Esquire’s spirits writer has selected a brew to go with each NFL team. Though you would think that Bud Light would be the obvious choice for the Cowboys –– because that’s pretty much what 99 percent of North Texans drink –– the Esquire guy selected good ol’ Rahr, brewed in good ol’ Fort Worth.

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Now you’d probably expect an F-Dub homer like me to be proud, maybe do a little celebration dance, maybe chug a celebratory Gravel Road. But all the selection does is serve to remind us Fort Worthians that we are *sigh* still Dallas’ little brother. But things could be worse. Dallas is a fine city to look up at. Imagine if we lived in Hurst, who’s looking up at Bedford, who’s looking up at Euless, looking up at Arlington, looking up at us, looking up at Dallas, looking up at Houston, looking up at Austin, looking up at Seattle, looking up at San Francisco, looking up at L.A., looking up at New York City.

 

I happen to have the good fortune of hailing from a city that looks up at no other city in the world –– NFL-y speaking. Though Esquire chose East End to represent the Sixburgh Steelers, the obvious choice is Iron City, brewed in Lawrenceville (not too far from my ancestral ’hood of Bloomfield) from 1861 (!) until 2005, when mismanagement forced Pittsburgh Brewing Company to file for Chapter 11. In 2007, the brand was relaunched and began fermenting at the Latrobe Brewing Company plant, former home of Rolling Rock.

 

Latrobe is about an hour from Pittsburgh, and had Esquire done a similar story as few as a couple of years ago and chose Rolling Rock to represent the Steelers, everyone in Pittsburgh proper would have rioted –– even though in terms of taste the Rock is far superior to I.C. (Budweiser-ish) and *gag* I.C. Light (glorified Old German).

 

Fort Worth is about –– what? –– 45 minutes from Dallas.

 

Where’s the riot, Dallas peeps? Virtual or otherwise?

 

Clearly, Pittsburghers are drunker than Dallasites, whose drunkenness pales in comparison to that of Fort Worthians, who are –– based on first-hand experience –– drunker than everyone.

 

Go, Steelers.

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