(photo by mike nicht)

The impending demise of Hostess means small children and large stoners will be heartbroken soon. But forward-thinking opportunists at Blotch see only opportunity in despair’s deepest shadows.

After something goes away, time marches on, and then people start looking back fondly and missing that particular thing.

People savvy enough to have stocked away said product eventually find themselves sitting on a goldmine, wither it’s Led Zepplin concert ticket stubs, Star Wars figurines, or Mickey Mantle rookie cards.


Twinkies make the perfect collectible.

“They never go bad — only cockroaches and Twinkies can survive a nuclear holocaust,” according to Herb N. Legend.

So buy a case of Twinkies. Put them in the attic. You’ll be able to put your children through college one day on the proceeds from those little sugar missiles.

At the very least, you can come home after a night of partying a couple of years from now, recall the case of Twinkies, climb up in the attic, and have a late night snack.