Every Wednesday for the last 30 years or so, the Fort Worth Weekly has published a print newspaper with informative articles spanning several sections, including art, books, calendar, eats and drinks, music, news, screen, and sports. Check out these gift ideas from each department.
Art: Ornamental
One local artist got some unexpected attention last week when one of the large handmade ornaments she’d created for the massive tree in Sundance Square was stolen. This is why we can’t have nice things. Sigh. Arely Morales’ painted piñata in the shape of her late cat Gris was taken by a lady Grinch on Sunday but was safely returned and rehung by Wednesday. If you’re looking to get your hands on a piece of Morales’ art by legitimate means, her works can be purchased primarily through Talley Dunn Gallery (5020 Tracy St, Dallas, 214-521-9898).
Books: A Tall Texas ‘Tail’
Since all we have to go on is the dust jacket copy, Jeff Guinn’s new novel, A Texas Tail (TCU Press), may be a great gift for the conservative in your life who reads something other than Breitbart and The Daily Stormer. (Does that kind of conservative even exist?) The story centers on Plunk Landy, whose dreams are the same as most other middle-aged male Texans. He imagines owning a top-end Ford 150, watching the Dallas Cowboys finally end their Super Bowl drought, and finding some way to become important. Instead, Plunk’s life consists of a dead-end job, an addiction to televised sports and Fox News (what he thinks of as “dates” with himself), and no fame at all beyond a lingering reputation as an oddball in the Fort Worth suburb where he grew up and still lives. But when Plunk stumbles across a unique Halloween costume in a local shop, he suddenly finds himself on a path to obtaining everything he has ever yearned for — and maybe more. As “Tail Man,” he intends to conquer his home state, first, then blaze a proud Texas path across the rest of the country, especially through “woke snake pits” like Los Angeles and New York City. Will Plunk’s dreams come true, or will he learn, as have many before him, that the worst fate in life is almost getting everything you’ve always wanted? The hardcover is $35.99 at TCUPress.TCU.edu.
Courtesy TCU Press
Eats & Drinks: Fruit Is ‘Magickal’
Certain members of your family may love the traditional holiday gift of fruits and nuts. Two local businesses specialize in these sorts of provisions: Green’s Produce & Plant (3001 W Arkansas Ln, Arlington, 682-564-0786) and Vending Nut Company (2222 Montgomery St, Fort Worth, 817-737-3071). From ready-made gift baskets to plenty of fodder for assembling your own, these stores have it going on. As for online retailers, there’s always the Hale Select Deluxe Gift Box for $46.99, which brings citrus fruit and snacks straight to your loved one’s door. Receive 37% off by ordering at HaleGrove.com/H6YG89.
As apples symbolize love, healing, health, wisdom, and divination, and a quick online search tells me that the “magickal” community has many ceremonial uses for stone fruits like apricots, peaches, and plums, your metaphysically minded folks might appreciate the Hale Groves Dried Fruit Wicker Gift Tray. Also priced at $49.99, it includes four colorful pounds of dried Angelino plums, apple rings, apricots, dates, kiwi, peaches, pears, and pitted prunes.
Courtesy Hale Groves
Music: Caress Me Down
If your favorite band shirt has seen better days, local crafters Zombie Killer Designs (@ZombieKillerDesigns) can help. Upcycling T-shirts into epic jackets and tops through applique with thrifted long-sleeved shirts, camo jackets, flannels, and such is kind of her thing. Case in point: the Sublime project pictured here. For local band merch and product ideas, check out this week’s Music feature.
Speaking of Sublime, they just made a big announcement. The Sublime Me Gusta Festival will make its debut in Fort Worth on Sat, May 9, at Panther Island Pavilion (395 Purcey St, Fort Worth, 817-335-2491). This new event marks the beginning of a national festival series built around the band. Taking its name from the iconic lyric “Me gusta mi reggae, me gusta punk rock,” the festival embodies everything Sublime stands for: sun-soaked vibes, rebellious spirit, and a love for music without boundaries. Tickets would make a great present for, well, me. General admission starts at $89.99 at MeGustaFest.com.
Courtesy Zombie Killer Designs
News: This Just In
Beyond our own Metropolis section, I prefer to consume my hard-hitting news the traditional way: via late-night television on Comedy Central. But that’s me. As the famous line in Steel Magnolias goes, “Spoken like a true smart ass.” I also really love The Onion. While I mostly follow their stories on social media and their website, I was excited to learn recently that they are still doing a print product. (Like we keep telling you, print is not dead!) Subscriptions are normally $99 per year, but for a limited time, it’s $75 total or $7 per month at Membership.TheOnion.com.
The Onion website will remain freely available to “every callous reader who refuses to surrender their credit card information,” but if you’d like to make a donation, they will gladly run your card for any number you can imagine.
Courtesy The Onion
Screen: Gifts for Film Lovers
Texas-based cinema company Alamo Drafthouse, with its closest location at Rayzor Ranch Town Center (3220 Town Center Tr, Denton, 940-441-4233), just launched a gift site for film lovers. Along with sections for apparel, accessories, curated collections, and items for your home and office, AlamoMart.com also includes a Gift Guide to help you with your choices. Things are broken down by options for beer lovers, kids, movie lovers, and stocking stuffers, plus search options for under $20, $30, and $50. They even sell wrapping paper.
Under home and office, I found this hand-poured Cinema Lens Candle by Film Society in Brooklyn for $35. This 100% vegan soy wax candle has notes of firewood, sage, and sandalwood and will burn for up to 35 hours.
Courtesy Alamo Drafthouse
Sports: Skating in the Stockyards
From now thru Sun, Jan 9, it’s time to head to the Stockyards as the annual Stockyards Rodeo Rink (121 E Exchange Av, Fort Worth, 817-625-1025) is up and running. Stop by for a 90-minute ice-skating session. Tickets can be purchased at the box office or FortWorthStockyards.com. The cost is $25 per adult and $20 per child. Family four-packs are available for $80. Skate rental is included. Passes would be a great way to be the #Funcle this year at Christmastime.
Courtesy Fort Worth Stockyards Station
