God appeared on Conan O’Brien’s show and dissed Dirk Nowitzki and the Dallas Mavericks.

I’m watching Conan, recorded on TIVO last night, and the TV funnyman introduced God to explain why the world didn’t end last weekend like it was supposed to.

A guy wearing a robe and gray wig and beard comes out and goes on a rant about Americans, saying we’re fat and lazy and we waste his time with pointless prayers: “It’s always, please God let Dirk Nowitzki make this foul shot. Who gives a crap about the Dallas-Oklahoma series?”

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Hey, we’re national! And celestial!

Well, maybe not. I googled Conan, Dirk, the Mavs, and God and couldn’t find a single reference to the comedy bit. Seems like sportswriters or bloggers or somebody somewhere might have noted it.

I guess “God” was right.