Breaking news on the Star-Telegram website:

“Burleson Elementary school evacuated after toilt paper set ablaze”

It was just one roll of the toilt paper burning at Taylor Elementary School.

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But it was the first time we have ever heard of that type of bathroom tissue ablazin’.  We don’t even know how to pronounce that kind of roll. The S-T copy editors must have had to go to the john badly while writing the headline.


  1. The “toilt” headline was up on the S-T online site for about three hours, but 15 minutes after this posting it was corrected. Which leads me to one conclusion: maybe the editors pay more attention to our blog postings than their own website. Also, Gary Wortel, please send me a fee for the copy editing needed that I pointed out.

  2. Was it ablazed on the roll, or after use?

    If the first case, it is arson (and a whole new word!)

    If the second, that school had better rethink their chili recipe.

  3. Maybe these kids are bringing chile from home, along with their Midol and Ibuprofen and other proscribed substances.

    Often, parents won’t think twice about leaving expired chili accessible to their children. DO NOT just throw it down the crapper unless you want the Trinity to become another Cuyahoga River – this isn’t Barry Manilow vanilla pudding, folks.