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RICK PERRY WAS CUT FROM THE VARSITY DEBATE TEAM BUT COACHES EXPECT HIM TO EXCEL ON JV SQUAD (photo courtesy wikipedia)

If Little Ricky Perry were on his high school debate team, he’d be having this conversation with his debate coach right about now:

PERRY: I can’t believe I got cut from varsity!

COACH: Don’t worry about it. You’ll excel on the junior varsity team, especially with those new glasses.

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PERRY: But I was relying on the glasses to make me a star on the varsity team!

COACH: It takes more than glasses. It takes a sharp mind. Do you really think you could have stood toe to toe with little Donny Trump in a debate?

PERRY: Donny is a tough debater, but he’ll probably call the school janitor a drug-running rapist or something. Jeb Bush has the charisma of a chalk board. Teddy Cruz will shoot spitwads at everybody. Chris Christie will eat all the snacks. And Rand Paul and Marco Rubio are just so darned smug. Nobody likes them. I could have beat them all!

COACH: You’ll just have to impress television viewers during the pre-debate debate with the JV squad.

PERRY: But Donny won’t be on it, so nobody will watch! (Ricky removes his glasses and breaks down crying on his coach’s shoulder.) It’s not fair!

COACH: There, there … .

Fade to black.

2 COMMENTS

  1. Why in pluperfect hell do the snot-rag Repugs allow this half-witted knuckle-head to continue disgracing Texas and our sweet USA? Enough is enough, have you greed-heads no shame…at long last have you no shame?

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